Last night was my first Domestic Violence (DV) Talk Story session in Ewa Beach with a group of about 15 people. I was a participant in this group, not a facilitator (yet). This is a program being implemented thanks to the Ewa Beach Community Development Organization.
To have a safe circle to talk about your feelings, your expectations, your experiences (direct and indirect) regarding DV was very eye opening and empowering. You don’t realize how much you and your family is exposed to DV until you sit down and actually talk about it. From neighbors fighting to random people on the street, violence is everywhere. Violence against intimate partners is a lot more common than most people think. It’s just “hidden” well. Violence against children still exists and its sad.
The two hour session was empowering. Why? Well, when you think you stand alone, most people won’t take a stance against DV. When you know your neighbor, your friend, and your community would stand up with you to help put a stop to it is empowering. If you saw or heard your neighbor getting abused, do you shut off the light and close the windows and doors? Or do you reach out to them? Whether it be yelling if they need help or calling 911? It’s easy to sit there and say, “Oh, I would definitely do something!” But would you in a real life situation? If you wouldn’t do anything, why?
You know what prompts me to say something? To do something? I look at that random person and think if that were my kid, my son, my daughter, my mom, my dad, my aunt, my uncle, I would hope that someone would take a stand for them in their moment of vulnerability. That’s what motivates me to do something about it.
The problem with the world today is thanks to the many lawyers out there who live to sue. If you get up to help someone, you risk the possibility of being sued for trying to help if something didn’t work out for the best. That negative reaction to someone offering a helping hand has turned this world cold. No one knows how to care for others anymore because of fear of retaliation or consequences. I remember a time when people cared. When you would see a kid giving their mom a hard time and you could step in and say, “your mommy said no, can you listen to your mommy and put the candy back?” to help ease the troubles and stress off that parent. In today’s world, some parents will retaliate against you for trying to help.
We need to get the world to care again. To do that, we have to start with ourselves. After that, we spread the love and care to our neighbors, our community, and pay it forward. Plant a seed and watch it grow. Are you willing to start the ripple effect?
The two hour session was empowering. Why? Well, when you think you stand alone, most people won’t take a stance against DV. When you know your neighbor, your friend, and your community would stand up with you to help put a stop to it is empowering. If you saw or heard your neighbor getting abused, do you shut off the light and close the windows and doors? Or do you reach out to them? Whether it be yelling if they need help or calling 911? It’s easy to sit there and say, “Oh, I would definitely do something!” But would you in a real life situation? If you wouldn’t do anything, why?
You know what prompts me to say something? To do something? I look at that random person and think if that were my kid, my son, my daughter, my mom, my dad, my aunt, my uncle, I would hope that someone would take a stand for them in their moment of vulnerability. That’s what motivates me to do something about it.
The problem with the world today is thanks to the many lawyers out there who live to sue. If you get up to help someone, you risk the possibility of being sued for trying to help if something didn’t work out for the best. That negative reaction to someone offering a helping hand has turned this world cold. No one knows how to care for others anymore because of fear of retaliation or consequences. I remember a time when people cared. When you would see a kid giving their mom a hard time and you could step in and say, “your mommy said no, can you listen to your mommy and put the candy back?” to help ease the troubles and stress off that parent. In today’s world, some parents will retaliate against you for trying to help.
We need to get the world to care again. To do that, we have to start with ourselves. After that, we spread the love and care to our neighbors, our community, and pay it forward. Plant a seed and watch it grow. Are you willing to start the ripple effect?
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